Regaining True Love

I have two dogs that I love as if they were my own children. With this love comes a sense of responsibility to make their lives happy and comfortable. To give them love and give them a sense of security. Perhaps this is crazy. Perhaps I am transferring basic human needs to animals. Perhaps they don’t need any of this.

But the truth is, these little creatures follow me every where. And if I sit down to write, or do anything, they want to be on top of me. I guess they want to be in close contact to feel reassured. But that’s my human mind speaking.

However, I’ve been learning and putting into practice “radical” concepts of eradicating pre-existing conditions in my mind. Ideas like “When I find this or get this I will be happy.” “When I have this amount of money I will be able to do whatever I want.” “When I find the right man I will feel loved.”

Ideas of security at any level or of any origen are fear based. Because at the end it seems like we all live in fear. And even when we find that love, that happiness, and hit the jackpot, we immediately start fearing the possibility of loosing love, happiness and the millions of dollars. It’s automatic. I was made aware of this, and it can’t be any truer.

Have you ever fallen madly in love with another person, and immediately start fearing the possibility of loosing them? Or you got a new job/assignment and start fearing you will loose it because of whatever idea you have of yourself being inadequate. Too good to be true, right? Issues of self-love and self-confidence.

So, what I’ve been learning and putting into practice, and this is no easy task, is to find that love, that security, and everything else, within me. To connect with my inner being, that being which is my true source (call it God, Grace, Universe, Intuition, Something, Je Ne Sais Quoi, Pencil, Tree), and be THE love. By being love, not only do I not need external influences but I am able to give love fully and unconditionally to others.

I’m working hard so that the day will come, hopefully in this lifetime, when I will no longer fear not sharing my daily life with those I truly love. That where ever I end up, I feel loved and secured, even when I am completely alone. Long gone will be the days of needing, grasping, feelings of emptiness, sense of lack, self-doubt…

As it is with my dogs, I have started to move their bed around the house to where ever I sit down to write or read, so they can rest and feel secure, and not be anxious because I’m not paying attention to them. Perhaps they don’t really need this. Perhaps they don’t really care. But my conditioned mind continues to transfer these feelings of human self-doubt to these precious beings whom we can learn a lot from.

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